65. The Mechanics of Emotional Stress

We all have experienced stressful moments where we were under pressure. We felt overwhelmed and anxious almost like something was pushing or pulling us against our wishes. Sometimes it became too much for us to handle and we broke in some sense. We couldn’t maintain our composure and reacted in some way like lashing out in anger or not eating for days. Here is an example of such a case:

Example: Marlin in "Finding Nemo"

Context:

In Pixar's "Finding Nemo," Marlin, a clownfish, faces immense stress and anxiety after his son Nemo is captured by a diver.

Stressful Moment:

Marlin is already overprotective due to past trauma, and the capture of Nemo sends him into a state of panic. He's overwhelmed with fear for his son's safety and guilt for not being able to protect him.

Overwhelmed and Anxious:

As Marlin embarks on the journey to find Nemo, he faces numerous challenges that increase his anxiety. The pressure to rescue his son, coupled with the dangerous and unpredictable ocean, pushes him to his limits.

Breaking Point:

At one point, Marlin and Dory, his companion, encounter a group of jellyfish. Marlin's anxiety reaches a breaking point, causing him to make rash decisions. Despite Dory's attempts to stay positive, Marlin's stress causes him to lash out in anger and frustration, leading them into even more danger.

Negative Reaction:

Marlin's fear and stress caused him to lose hope momentarily. He becomes pessimistic, doubting their ability to find Nemo and pushing Dory away with his negative attitude. His inability to maintain composure and his outburst strain their partnership and make the situation feel even more hopeless.

Using this example I will attempt to teach you something interesting and useful. 

Connecting Emotional Stress to Mechanics

The fear that Marlin experiences after his son Nemo is captured applies a force to him creating stress and pressure. This is similar to applying a force to a physical object like bending a stick. The stick experiences stress or pressure due to the bending force. We know that if you keep bending the stick more it will eventually break just like when the stress on Marlin increased to the point where it caused him to make rash decisions. So we can see we can relate an emotional experience to physics/mechanics. Let’s look at the mechanic's point of view and see if it can teach us anything about dealing with emotional stress. 

Mechanics Insights:

• Thin sticks are easier to bend, while thick sticks are harder to bend. Thickness matters in stress tolerance.
• Longer sticks are easier to bend than shorter ones. Therefore, size matters in stress resistance.

How can this help us with how we manage or cope with emotional stress? What could “size” mean in the emotional sense? We must look deeper at the emotional stress on Marlin to understand this. I know we said the stress was impacting Marlin but what part of him was it affecting? Remember Marlin was overprotective because of what happened to his wife and their eggs. He lost them and reacted to that stress by being overbearing to Nemo. Now he feels guilty, the same guilt he had about his wife’s death, for not protecting his son but something was different this time. This time he could try to do something about the situation facing him and his son. His perspective was that it was not over. If there was nothing he could do he could become distraught and sink into a pit of grief “bending” him more like a thin stick but because he could do something, even something as improbable as finding his son, his ability to respond to the stress was better. 

Emotional insight:

Finding possibilities to do something in response to stress may help make you more resilient. 

There is much to learn by using either concept, emotional or mechanical stress, to understand the other. They both serve as rich metaphors for each other. I hope you continue to explore this approach increasing your understanding of how you can respond to stress in your life.